Screwed
by GrammarFuher
Summary: Ulrich wakes up one day to find that all his friends are different and Lyoko never existed. Rated T for language and random acts of violence.


Ulrich had a strange feeling that something was wrong. Ever since he woke up that day, he felt out of place. Everything seemed slightly different, including his friends. During breakfast, he sat down in his usual spot with his fellow Lyoko Warriors. Odd seemed normal. However, Yumi appeared to be a bit loony, as when she reached the table, she started reading what appeared to be a graphic novel - backwards. Even stranger, Sissi came to the table and sat down in Aelita's spot. She never came. She began to dicuss somethin about "fooly cooly" or something along those lines. "_Wait, when did Sissi and Yumi become best friends?_" Ulrich pondered. Perhaps the most oddest thing of all was Jeremy. When he walked into the room, people stopped whatever they were doing and froze. Ulrich knew by their facial expressions that they were terrified. Jeremy stopped and glanced at a table full of jocks. They shrieked like little girls. He chuckled at this, and carried on. The only people that weren't frightened out of their minds were the ones at Ulrich's table, as well as Hiroshi, Ben, and a handful of other people. When Jeremy finally reached the table, the cafeteria was filled with sighs of relief. "_Did Jeremy's very presence scare the everloving crap out of everyone?_" Ulrich thought. "_What the f***king hell is going on?_" As Jeremy sat down, the jocks he scared left the cafeteria, looking very embarrased. "The bastards probably wet their pants," he observed with a little too much glee in Ulrich's opinion.

Later that day, Ulrich and his friends were hanging out near a bench at Kadic Academy. Jeremy was sitting on said bench, playing a first person shooter that looked like a movie Pixar would make if the entire studio went nuts. "Uh, Jeremy?" Ulrich inquired as he poked him. "What?" Jeremy replied, obviously annoyed. "Well, shouldn't you be, y'know, working on fighting XANA?" Jeremy looked very confused. "What the hell are you talking about Ulrich?" he replied. Ulrich was shocked. "_How could he not know about XANA?_" he thought. "Y'know, evil computer virus, wants to enslave humanity, resides in a supercomputer- HOW DO YOU NOT REMEMBER THIS?" "Uh, Ulrich?" Yumi said. "We dont' know what the hell you're talking about. I don't think anyone on the _planet _knows what the hell you're talking about." Ulrich could not believe his ears. "Don't you remember anything about Lyoko?" He shouted. He then explained everything about XANA, Franz Hopper, and Lyoko itself. "Sounds like the plot of some stupid cartoon from France," commented Odd. "Aren't we in France?" replied Ulrich. "Let's see," said Jeremy sarcastically, "we use green paper money, we speak English, and our flag has red and white stripes with a blue field in in the top left corner with stars on it. We _must _be in France- OF COURSE WE'RE NOT IN FRANCE YOU IDIOT! We are obviously in Amercia, or more to be more specific, the state of New York in a city that's very close to the Canadian border. If anyone's speaking French here, they're either a Canadian or a French major from the Bronx." Jeremy then went back to gaming. "Y'know, Jeremy, I don't remember you being a gamer." His friends looked at him as if he was insane. "Forget I said anything. Speaking of gaming, Jeremy, why don't you do something fun in _reality_ today?" "Good idea," Jeremy replied, pausing his game. He then pulled out a Colt .44 Magnum blew someone's head off. "OH MY GOD, WHAT THE F***KING HELL, JEREMY?" Ulrich exclaimed with shock. "What?" replied Jeremy calmly. "YOU JUST **KILLED SOMEONE FOR NO REASON! **" "I had a reason," Jeremy protested. "I was bored. And besides, I have a license." He pulled out his killing license and showed to a shocked Ulrich. "A ...killing license? They actually make these? How the hell did you get this?" "Joined the school rifle club. A killing license is issued to all members," Jeremy replied. Ulrich facepalmed. "What the hell is going on?"

Author's Note: I actually hate Code Lyoko with a passion. So I decided to fix it through removing the main plot and character derailment. And by the way, if you think Jeremy is derailed enough, just wait for the next chapter...heh heh heh...


End file.
